


yeah, sure

by orphan_account



Category: ONF (Band)
Genre: M/M, i'm posting this - Freeform, yup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-18
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-07-13 20:34:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16025492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account





	yeah, sure

He’s fucked, he’s so totally over the moon seriously fucked. 

Leaning his back on the bathroom wall he takes a second to take a look in the mirror. His hair is everywhere, tears running down his face and his eyes all red. He can’t see the blush but, the heat starts to sting in his skull he can hardly take it. his pants are half off, boxers too low on his narrow hips.

It’s 4 am the last time he checked, everyone's asleep in their dorm. Minkyuns in the bathroom because he can’t sleep. that's what he's been telling himself.

minkyun was masturbating.

and that's not weird. it’s a natural form of expressing sexuality, a healthy thing. not once had minkyun ever thought as masturbating as a “bad thing", he was confident enough in his own skin to carry that part of his personal life with some dignity.

yeah, sure.

tonight, under the cool, almost green fluorescent lights of the biggest bathroom in their small dorm. minkyun had laid with his face pressed to the plasticky floor, and masturbated. 

yeah.

but the thing that worries him, the thing that has him raking himself over in the mirror with a varying degree of bewilderment and disgust. the thing that makes him want to crawl into a hole and do something worse than just die there. 

he'd been thinking about hyojin.

not the, “hyojin popped into my head for a second and oh  _ geez _ that was weird.”. he'd been thinking of him the whole time, an intentional shift in his thoughts. it wasn't like this is the first time he's done this, he's guilty of hundreds of “what have i done” moments like these. and it doesn't get any easier.

hes masturbated to the thought of his leader, his superior almost, doing things to him that could get him fired. his career ruined, years of a dream shattered. get him hung upside down, duct taped to a flaming stake. because yeah, it was  _ that _ serious. 

he jokes about it.

he jokes about wanting to marry hyojin, about how handsome he is, kisses him naturally like he does everyone else.

and from a certain angle it just looks like basic idol nonsense. 

and from a certain angle it is, he intends to be cute and charming. he intends to say the words and have them evaporate in the air like cotton candy in his mouth but they stay. they stay cold and hard in his ears. because everyone around him just heard something, they saw something, honest.  

because, honestly, yeah.

he wants he and hyojin to be naked together. he wants to place a ring in hyojin’s finger and shout to the world, “ha losers, this one's mine!”. he want to be able to tell him how beautiful he is without his only response be a glance to the camera. that's what he wants and he's sorry he’s not perfect. he's sorry this is wrong, bad, gross and everything in between.

but it's done. 

he's done it.

now all he can do is shove that truth back down his throat and go the fuck to sleep.


End file.
